“Gratitude is a powerful human emotion. By conveying and receiving simple ‘thank you’ messages, we can truly derive the pleasure that we seek everywhere else,” wrote psychiatric counselor Madhuleena Roy Chowdhury, BA. Gratitude, if promulgated accordingly, will reap bountiful benefits for your children.
Isn’t it such a satisfying feeling to raise a child who knows how to be thankful for everything that life bestows on them no matter how big or small or good or bad the outcome may be?
If you were ever lost for words to explain to your children why they should care about curfew, then do not worry we have been in the same boat and are here for you. It is vital that you never tell your kids, ‘because I said so.’ as a justification for any of your actions. While it might be a quick answer to the now, your child will lack the proper knowledge of why to not do what you are trying to push them away from. Imagine what will happen in the teenage years when they try to look for reasons to not stay out past curfew will it be just because you say so? If this was new information to you, then read on for some other important parental information.
“Curfews are an important tool in helping to manage a teen and keep them away from risky situations,” said Michael Dennis, PhD. “They are at risk for being able to use and/or using to the point of getting in a dangerous situation in terms of sexual risk, being in a car with a driver being intoxicated, getting into a fight, and a variety of other things. Therefore, it’s important for parents to come up with clear boundaries about when kids need to be home and to make sure that those kids follow those boundaries.”
Aside from typical home curfews, Katelyn Alcamo, LCMFT, also suggests setting a technology curfew for younger kids. She said, “This means all devices should be stored with the parents after a certain time of night. This is the time when most kids get into trouble with their social media use, as it is often unsupervised. There is no one available to support them if something negative happens.”
Source: pixabay.com
Choosing The Right Time
Now the best time to tell your kid about a curfew might come to a surprise to most parents, but it is now. The rumours that there is a certain age to start talking about curfew is just that rumor. What is the right time to start teaching responsibility? What is the right time to not worry about your child? When is the right time for someone to snatch your kids off of the streets? While it is impossible to keep your child a hundred percent safe (unless you are fortunate enough to afford to homeschool), it is possible to mitigate. The timing is not what you need to worry about but rather the wording.
“The matter of curfew raises both specific and symbolic issues. Specifically, curfew has to do with how late an adolescent is allowed to stay out by parents who set a time she has to be home. Symbolically, curfew has to do with parents setting limits on the adolescent’s personal and social freedom at an older age,” wrote Carl E Pickhardt, PhD.
Stern But Fair
When you are telling your kid about curfew, it is important that establish a stern but fair tone and nothing on the far end. Coming off as too stern then you child might feel rebellious in later years and miss curfew just to spite you when it is just notwithstanding their safety. However, if you are too lax, then the seriousness of the curfew will fall on deft ears which are just as terrible. Read on if you are having trouble with the wording.
Source: facebook.com
Explain
Now to sound like you are setting these new timelines for their safety rather than abitarily is to speak to your child like an adult. The worst thing that you talk to them below their intelligence as this will be a conversation that they are going to need to remember for years. Do not spare any of the gory details either as you tell them everything from curfew police to the drunks to the child molesters that walk the streets. It is also important to teach your kid that not all strangers all evil. Just the ones that are overly friendly at first or seem gruff from appearance. There might not be a way to tell your kid what a child molester looks like but you can tell them what a decent stranger looks like but under no circumstances should they follow or take anything from a said person.
Source: flickr.com
Reward
The last and least important thing that you need to tell your kid after all else has been mentioned is that they will not go unrewarded. This site has an excellent article on creating a reward system but here is an overview of reward systems that you can do depending on your budget:
*Tight Budget Reward System
Have your child write a top ten of things that they want for Christmas. Tell them that you will mark out and a checkmark by their behaviour to the curfew rules.
*Moderate Budget Reward System
Use your knowledge of your kid to your advantage as you give them their most/least favourite food in accordance to their behaviour. If they are good for prolonged periods of time, the rare non-holiday gift is beneficial.
*High Budget Reward System
Plainly start an allowance for your child. Something you wish your parents had done huh?
First-time parents will experience a lot of changes once their firstborn arrives.
What are to be expected? How are your lifestyle and your relationship with your partner going to be affected? How will your body and mind take these adjustments?
Naturally, parents tend to be overprotective of their children in such a way that may or may not be beneficial.
Chances are, you have become that kind of parent who is unknowingly holding back your child or children from thriving independently and also keeping them from fully exhibiting their potential of becoming a good leader someday. Failure to recognize this parenting error can severely affect your children’s progress and cripple their likelihood gaining a solid image for themselves, coddling them through every aspect of their lives.
As you might have guessed, we are against letting an, at the cheapest, $500, 1.5 pound-screen define your parenting abilities. We can’t count how many adverse developmental effects of excessive iPad usage have been talked about, but believe us when we say it’s not right. We’re talking things like speech delay, obesity, and psychological disorders.
We’re here to make sure that we open the eyes of parents everywhere that sometimes old-fashioned is good:
Sports
Source: gurgaonmoms.com
Either find a sport your child could enjoy inside your home, or enroll them in a sports class like swimming or soccer, as many moms have recommended. The incredible fact about sports is that it provides learning on both the physical and emotional aspects. Your child’s attention will be kept only because you’re introducing a new concept wherein their body will be engaged. They’re going to learn how to listen, imitate, follow the rules, and wait for instructions. “In the short run, young athletes get to have fun running, throwing, kicking, jumping, turning, or whatever a sport has to offer, which means they are physically active. Many sports are played outside, which further promotes their overall health.” says Jim Taylor Ph.D. He adds “These benefits are especially important these days where far too many kids are spending far too much time indoors in front of a screen.”
Find neighbors and relatives who are also interested in involving their kids in sports programs. It’ll be great for you to have people to carpool with and chat while the kids are doing their thing.
Arts & Crafts
Source: pentelblog.files.wordpress.com
For those parents who aren’t so keen on leaving their homes or having to watch their kids to not hurt themselves, we can thank our ancestors for introducing arts & crafts. It’s a great alternative to the usual plastic toys because your child learns about their ability to create. The feeling of being able to translate what they’re thinking into something their eyes can see will extraordinarily keep their attention. Susan K Perry Ph.D. wrote “Teach them to keep an open mind about what creativity is and what art can be. Even if they don’t choose to pursue art as a career, such open-mindedness will help them in so many ways.”
Join them, or have the whole family join them, and encourage them to explore different techniques, even if it means getting messy. It’ll teach them to communicate & have fun while doing it!
Movies
Here is where we give you a half-and-half about the least effort alternative technique to handing your kid an iPad, and that is to put on a good movie on your home TV. It provides a more controlled environment for your child because you can decide what to play on the TV, instead of giving them full authority to do whatever they want. Choose good movies! Read as many reviews as you can, especially if they’re kid-friendly for your child’s particular age.
Try looking for singing and dancing videos for your kid as well. You can find a lot online or check out some singing and dancing for boys and girls xbox games. This is to encourage them to get up and move around, so they know better than to sit all day. Nate Kornell Ph.D. advises that “If you want to be good at something, the first step is to try a lot of things. Be patient and let something you’re good at choose you. This is true for everything where performance matters; instruments, sports, academic subjects, and so on. Even occupations.”
We know that having iPads for your kids makes your life infinitely more comfortable, because, in places outside your home like the supermarket or the mall, it becomes your best chance at avoiding a public spectacle from your children. Once in a while is alright, but remember to balance it with all the alternatives today’s world provides.
Get them to speak, get them to interact with people, get them to do something active everyday to help ensure the best development for your child. They will surely be thankful in the future once they are reaping the benefits of being not dependent on iPad.
