Having children is a wish for a lot of people. They say that you will only realize the true meaning of being alive when you have kids to care for and cherish. You will know what it’s like to sacrifice without feeling a morsel of regret about it. You can experience happiness, no matter how challenging it can be to provide their needs.
The thing is, most parents believe that the rebellious phase only comes when their kids hit puberty. That’s when they become hormonal, after all, and develop mood swings. It is a part of growing up – something that no one can ever stop. Carl E Pickhardt Ph.D. explains this “Although the young person thinks rebellion is an act of independence, it actually never is. It is really an act of dependency. Rebellion causes the young person to depend their self-definition and personal conduct on doing the opposite of what other people want.”
However, it is not uncommon either to see children rebel even before they become adolescents. To avoid becoming dumbfounded when you experience it firsthand, you should know what pushes them to become rebellious early.
They Feel Treated Unfairly
The first reason why kids rebel early is perhaps jealous. Among siblings, there is usually a weakling who require parents’ care more than others. If a child does not realize that, they may think that their mom or dad favors their brother or sister more. It may then cause them to act up so that they can receive some attention, regardless if it’s good or bad. “Sometimes parents think that comparing one sibling to another will inspire a misbehaving child to behave better. It NEVER works this way. Comparisons hurt.” emphasized Eileen Kennedy-Moore Ph.D.
Their Parents Filed For Divorce
When parents decide to divorce each other, they say that it’s for the best. However, kids do not exactly understand that and want their mom and dad to stay together forever. If it does not happen, they may choose to take part in activities that they have been told not to do. E.g., sneaking out, smoking, dating, doing drugs, etc. Marilyn Price-Mitchell Ph.D. says that “Research shows that parents who experience conflict in their relationship tend to use inconsistent disciplinary strategies with their children. Why? It is hypothesized that the way parents discipline children varies with the status of the spousal relationship.”
They Have Depression
Children can have depression. Millions of them have already been diagnosed with it from the tender age of 3. Dealing with this disorder entails that they may push away their loved ones. When their siblings try to play with them, the depressed kid may turn their back. If the parents want to bond with them or take a picture together, they either lock the bedroom door or not smile at all.
No One Seems To Understand Them
This issue is typically experienced by kids with high IQ levels. The truth is that some brilliant children tend to talk about things that their parents with average IQ may not understand. They may speak of quantum physics in the middle of a conversation, and their mom or dad will not know how to respond. They may ask about chemical reactions, but no one tries to answer them. As a result, they act up to gain a response.
Kids are born good. They may already show different personalities as soon as they arrive, but they are all sweet and cuddly. Their only fault is that they are excellent at copying the actions or emotions of others. In case you notice their attitudes turning sour, therefore, there is no one to blame but the people they hang out with most of the time.
Considering you don’t want your kids to rebel early, you should not push them to do it with your decisions and behavior.